


Don't Leave

by TheAsexualofSpades



Series: It Started With a Flower [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Gwen holds the brain cell let's be real here, Hurt/Comfort, Idiots in Love, Light Angst, M/M, Magic Revealed, Merlin's Magic Revealed (Merlin), Protective Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Protective Gwen (Merlin)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:28:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26572210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAsexualofSpades/pseuds/TheAsexualofSpades
Summary: Gwen was not raised to be a worrier. She was not raised to make a fuss about every little thing, twiddling her thumbs this way and that over the slightest thing that goes wrong. She was not raised to fret over someone else, at least not like this.And yet, Merlin, sweet, clumsy, oblivious little Merlin deserves to be fussed over, just a little.
Relationships: Gwen & Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen & Merlin (Merlin), Gwen/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Gwen/Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: It Started With a Flower [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1932676
Comments: 12
Kudos: 428





	Don't Leave

**Author's Note:**

> thanks to everyone who asked for a sequel! and also oh god Gwen how do you deal with these two idiots tell me your SECRETS

Gwen was not raised to be a worrier. She was not raised to make a fuss about every little thing, twiddling her thumbs this way and that over the slightest thing that goes wrong. She was not raised to fret over someone else, at least not like this.

And yet, Merlin, sweet, clumsy, oblivious little Merlin deserves to be fussed over, just a little.

She’s not alone as she does it, no. Arthur can’t be removed from Merlin’s side for more than a few moments without breaking into an irritable huff and demanding things with the temper of a hungry child. Luckily for all of them, Arthur is King and Gwen is Queen. They can have other people do the things that would require leaving for more than just the barest amount of time to fetch something. Which is good, because Merlin is still horribly unwell.

“I can’t believe you just _ran off_ like that,” Gwen sighs, lifting the goblet to Merlin’s mouth so he can drink, “you didn’t so much as hesitate about it, did you?”

“I left you a note,” Merlin defends once the goblet has been pulled away from his lips, “and I gave you flowers!”

“Yes, _Merlin,_ ” Arthur grumps from his perch on the end of the bed, “instead of saying you were leaving like a _normal_ person you gave Guinevere cryptic flowers and left.”

Merlin flushes and mumbles something. Gwen and Arthur exchange a look and Arthur prods Merlin. Merlin swats at him half-heartedly and lets his head fall back.

“…didn’t think I’d be here for that,” he mutters, not meeting their gazes.

Oh, _Merlin…_

“What the hell do you mean, you ‘didn’t think you’d be here for this?’” Arthur swings himself off the bed, eyes like flint chips. “Are you seriously expecting me to believe that you—you—“

“Arthur,” Gwen warns.

“No, Gwen!” Arthur gestures at Merlin. “You’re seriously just going to sit there and pretend you’re alright with Merlin going off on a suicide mission without saying goodbye?”

“No,” Gwen says cooly, drawing herself up a little, “I am not going to pretend I’m okay with that. However, I am _also_ not going to yell and raise my voice at someone who is _hurt_ and already feeling terribly guilty, _as I have mentioned/_ ”

_That_ gets Arthur’s attention, again. He wilts, sitting sheepishly back down on the bed, this time up by his head and mumbling an apology. Merlin simply turns and lightly presses his forehead against Arthur’s flank.

“Now,” Gwen says quietly, setting the goblet aside and gently running her hand through Merlin’s hair, “will you talk to us about this, Merlin?”

“…do I have to?”

“Yes,” Arthur says immediately, “yes, you have to.”

Despite Merlin’s pale face, he manages to glare up at Arthur. “Prat.”

“Idiot,” Arthur shoots back, but as Gwen looks at him, she sees the way his eyes dart straight to Merlin’s forehead, still lightly beaded with sweat, the way his hand trembles on the outside of his lap, the way his mouth is drawn so tight it makes his bottom lip quiver.

Her husband is terrified, Gwen realizes, not that she’s much better off.

“Merlin—“

“Don’t,” Merlin coughs, trying to sit up only for Arthur to push him back down—“For god’s sake, Merlin, you look like you’re about to faint!”—and glare, “don’t beg, you…you asked, I’ll get there.”

Gwen shoots Arthur a worried look before returning her attention to the man in the bed. Merlin tugs his bottom lip between his teeth and sighs.

“It, um…it was a conspiracy,” Merlin says slowly, “they, uh…wanted to kill you two. Well, mostly Arthur. I think they underestimated you, Gwen.”

She accepts the compliment with a small nod but nudges Merlin’s shoulder. “You’re leaving things out.”

“Damn right he is,” Arthur growls.

“Don’t think you want to hear about…everything,” Merlin says quietly, “it, um…wasn’t exactly a great story.”

“I don’t care about it being a great story, Merlin,” Arthur says, “I want to know what happened.”

“I told you what happened!”

“You told me what might have been the most _basic_ outline of what happened.”

“…yeah, and?”

“Merlin!”

“Arthur,” Gwen says sharply, “do I need to ask you to wait outside?”

Arthur’s mouth snaps shut. “No.”

Gwen sighs. These boys, what _would_ they do to each other? She reaches over and runs a hand through Arthur’s hair too, smiling a little when Arthur slumps under the attention, pressing himself more fully against Merlin.

“Now,” Gwen says again—honestly, this is getting repetitive—“Merlin is going to tell us what happened, we are not going to get angry, and then we will figure out what to do next, yes?”

Arthur nods, his eyes still fixed on Merlin. Merlin nods, shuffling a little under the blankets. Gwen nods, giving each of them one last pat before drawing away.

“Good. Merlin? Whenever you’re ready.”

Merlin is most certainly not ready and really does not want to ever be ready thank you _very_ much.

He—this wasn’t supposed to happen. He was, well, he was supposed to die in that fight. Hell, he’s pretty sure he _did_ die in that fight. All he remembers is collapsing onto the ground one second and then waking up in their chambers the next. He _doesn’t know what happened._

Well, he could _tell_ them that, but he knows that’s not what they’re asking.

But that would mean he has to tell them a _lot._ Like…he has to admit that he’s been lying to all of them since he arrived. And that’s…that’s a lot, okay?

Plus, he’s just _found_ out that they care about him. Actually care about him. So he’s not really willing to push that.

But also then what happens if they find all this out later and he’s sent away and they decide they don’t love him after all and then he’s ruined it by _not_ telling him and—

Yeah, see this is why everything would’ve been easier if this _hadn’t_ turned out this way.

  
Arthur, of course, as if he can _hear_ Merlin’s thoughts, promptly tangles his hand in Merlin’s hair and wow that is simply _not fair_ because Arthur’s fingers know how to scratch and stroke at all the right places and not pull Merlin’s hair at all and no, no, Merlin’s not going to melt for them, he’s not going to—

Then comes Gwen’s soft voice asking him gently what happened and he’s a goner.

“I, um…” Merlin swallows. “…Gaius has books about…there are…”

No, he can’t get Gaius in trouble too.

“…there are books about magical threats,” he settles on eventually, “that are used when, um…”

“When we think there’s a chance a threat might be magical,” Gwen supplies helpfully. Merlin nods, Arthur’s hand barely twitching as it keeps raking through his hair.

“Yes, and I…um…the…”

_Fuck,_ he can’t think with Arthur’s hand in his hair like that. He just can’t.

Despite everything, he thinks he hears Arthur chuckle somewhere above him, saying something about being able to shut him up properly. He’s also pretty sure he hears Gwen chide him about the fact that now is not, in fact, a good time to shut Merlin up and in fact they should be _listening,_ Arthur. He can practically see Arthur roll his eyes before that hand moves out of his hair, down his neck, to rest on his shoulder.

He blinks.

“…the threat was magical,” he manages before his brain comes back online enough to activate the common sense filter again. He hears Gwen draw a sharp breath from beside him.

“And you went all by yourself?”

Merlin’s throat runs dry as he nods. When Arthur’s hand leaves his shoulder he braces himself for another shouting match—a one-sided shouting match—but instead, Arthur gets up and goes to the doors.

Merlin watches as best he can, eyes wide, as Arthur opens the door to murmur something to the guard and then locks the bolt tightly.

“What…why…” He can only stammer as Arthur rejoins them at the bed.

“Figured this isn’t something just anyone should hear,” is Arthur’s defense, his hand going to Merlin’s shoulder again.

Gwen gently turns Merlin’s chin to face her. “Keep going, Merlin, you can speak freely here.”

_Can I?_

Merlin swallows again. “It, um…I…went to go fix it,” he finished lamely.

“All by yourself?”

He nods.

“But you…Merlin,” Gwen sighs, “that wasn’t a good idea, why didn’t you tell us? We would’ve helped, we could’ve sent—“

“They would’ve been hurt,” Merlin defends.

“And you were almost killed,” Arthur says sharply, “you think you could do better than the rest of the knights?”

_Yes, but I can’t tell you why._

Curse Arthur and his ability to somehow always know what’s Merlin’s thinking because he narrows his eyes at him. “Why, Merlin? Don’t lie to me this time.”

“I’m not lying!”

“Lying by leaving things out is still lying,” Gwen says gently. Merlin closes his eyes and curses.

“Tell me, Merlin,” Arthur whispers _and no no no don’t ask like that, Merlin has to say yes if he asks like that,_ “please, tell me?”

“Tell you what?”

“Tell me why you think you’re worth so much less than you are,” he says, “why you think you could take this on alone. Did…did you have to make some sort of sacrifice?”

“That’s Lancelot’s game,” Gwen says, “isn’t it?”

Through the agonizing debate going on in Merlin’s head right now, he cracks a smile. “You should tell him that.”

“He’s the one that told me.”

“Of course he did.”

“ _Merlin._ ”

Right.

Merlin really doesn’t want to do this.

“I have magic,” he blurts, “I…I stopped it.”

Arthur’s heart hits the floor.

Merlin…oh, Merlin…

Clumsy, loyal, _wonderful_ little Merlin.

How terrified must he have been, must he _still_ be of living in Camelot, of living in the _heart_ of Camelot, under his father, under _him…gods,_ Arthur can’t even imagine.

What must Merlin have _seen?_ He’s no fool, not really, not in any way that counts. And if he’s had magic this whole time…well, let’s just say it’s making Arthur see a few things in a new light.

The druid boy…no wonder Merlin had been so involved with everything.

All those magical things that _suddenly_ disappeared or revealed themselves at the right moment. Valiant? The troll? What else is he missing?

What part of the story doesn’t he have yet?

And all those times a branch just mysteriously fell out of nowhere, or a root tripped a bandit, or the bandit got skewered by his own sword. That was Merlin, wasn’t it?

Shit, do the knights know? Some of them must, surely…Leon he knows is one of the most observant men he’s ever met and he’s been around longer than both Arthur and Merlin. Gwaine? Maybe. He’s more Merlin’s knight than Arthur’s. Lancelot…probably. That man has a face that makes _everyone_ want to tell him their secrets.

Oh, _Merlin…_

How lonely this must’ve been for him…with this massive secret looming over him, creeping over his shoulder every which way he turns as he runs to a fro along the length of Camelot. There isn’t anything that could’ve eased this burden, is there, short of telling _someone?_

What about Gaius?

Well…actually, that’s the only part of this that doesn’t seem surprising at all.

Gaius practiced magic before the Great Purge. He has a high ranking position in Camelot both as Royal Physician and as a member of the King’s Council. He has the ear of the King and the power of a noble, even if he isn’t high born himself. And he is the leading expert in Camelot on most things magical.

Of _course_ he has been Merlin’s ally.

Merlin…

And what has Arthur done to help him? Does Merlin…after everything, does Merlin truly believe that Arthur cares naught for him, not any more than he would a normal servant?

“Arthur?”

Hmm?

“ _Arthur._ ”

Oh. Gwen’s calling him. He blinks and realizes Merlin’s staring at him with a fearful look on his face as Gwen reaches out to cover his hand. Has he…oh, he hasn’t said anything since Merlin told them he has magic, has he?

“Merlin,” he says softly, “Merlin, I’m so sorry.”

Merlin blanches. “What? Why are you—“

“Because I imagine if we—if _I_ had been clearer about how I feel about you,” he continues, leaning down to rest their foreheads together, “I imagine you might not have been so willing to tear off like that.”

Merlin shudders under the touch. “…maybe?”

“Putting this aside,” Arthur continues, sitting up a little, “all this mess with that…magical conspiracy, would you have…told us? Eventually?”

The way Merlin’s eyes gleam as he hesitates tells Arthur that he _wants_ to say yes, he _wants_ to, but he’s not sure. Arthur looks up at Gwen for help.

“Thank you for telling us, Merlin,” Gwen says a little shakily, “I, er…I imagine that could not have been easy.”

Merlin shakes his head, reaching out for Gwen. Arthur watches with a smile on his face as the two people he loves wrap their arms around each other, noticing how their hands tremble.

“I thought…” Gwen tucks her chin over Merlin’s shoulder and her lip wobbles. “I thought I’d never see you again, Merlin. I thought I’d…I thought I’d lost my best friend.”

“I’m sorry Gwen, I—“

“I’m sorry too.”

“We’re all sorry,” Arthur mumbles, mostly to himself, “we _all_ should be sorry.”

“Speak for yourself,” Merlin says into Gwen’s shoulder. Arthur pokes the spot on Merlin’s side that makes him squeak and hug Gwen closer.

Gwen fixes him with a look over Merlin’s shoulder. “Does this mean we can start moving faster now?”

Arthur hums in agreement only to laugh when Merlin lets out another confused noise. “Not like that, Merlin.”

“We’re drafting some new legislation,” Gwen says as she helps him lay back down, “about overturning the ban on magic and the Old Religion.”

Merlin’s eyes go wide. “You—you’re going to—“

“Well, don’t you think?” Gwen smiles. “It would be nice for people like me and my family to be able to practice again.” She reaches forward and ruffles Merlin’s hair. “Not to mention the things it would do for people like _you._ ”

Merlin’s mouth falls agape, his eyes darting from Gwen to Arthur and back. Arthur simply smiles and squeezes Merlin’s hand tightly between his.

“It was the first thing I said I’d do when I became King a long time ago,” he murmurs, watching Merlin’s eyes go even wider, “and now…now I have even more of an incentive to do so.”

He smirks. “Can’t have my Court Sorcerer being illegal, now can I?”

“Arthur,” Gwen chides with a smile, “we said we’d _wait_ to tell him that. Now you’ve gone an overwhelmed him.”

“Like _you_ didn’t start it.”

“Ladies don’t start fights, but we can finish them.”

“W-wait, wait, you—“ their gazes go back to Merlin— “you…you want me as your…Court Sorcerer?”

Leaning down, Gwen presses a kiss to Merlin’s forehead. “There is no one I would rather have.”

“Is that something you want, Merlin?” Arthur watches his face anxiously. “Please, tell me?”

“Y-yes, oh Arthur, Gwen—“ Merlin tugs them all down into a tight hug, laughing as they go— “ _thank you._ ”

Gwen kisses Arthur’s cheek then Merlin’s. “Only if you promise to stay with us.”

“I’ll stay,” Merlin repeats breathlessly, “I’ll stay…as long as you want me.”

And what is Arthur to do but hold his loved ones tightly?

_“Always.”_

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Come yell at me on tumblr. 
> 
> https://a-small-batch-of-dragons.tumblr.com/


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